NEWS ALERT: WITH ONE HALF OF ONE PER CENT OF PRECINCTS REPORTING, HONK IF YOU LIKE HONKING CAN NOW PROJECT THAT KIM JONG-IL WILL APPOINT HIS SON TO BE THE NEXT DICTATOR OF NORTH KOREA.

TONIGHT'S OTHER BIG WINNERS:

Robert Mugabe, Zimbabwe

Omar al-Bashir, Sudan (unopposed)

Than Shwe, Burma (unopposed)

King Abdullah, Saudi Arabia (unopposed)

Hu Jintao, China (unopposed)

Sayyid Ali Khamenei, Iran (unopposed)

Isayas Afewerki, Eritrea (unopposed)

G. Berdymuhammedov, Turkmenistan (write-in candidate)*

Muammar al-Qaddafi, Libya (unopposed)

Islam Karimov, Uzbekistan (unopposed)

Bashar al-Assad, Syria (unopposed)

Raúl Castro, Cuba (unopposed)**

Teodoro Obiang Nguema, Equatorial Guinea (unopposed)

Aleksandr Lukashenka, Belarus (unopposed)

Meles Zenawi, Ethiopia (unopposed)

Idriss Déby, Chad (unopposed)

King Mswati III, Swaziland (unopposed)

Paul Biya, Cameroon (unopposed)

Hosni Mubarak, Egypt (unopposed)

* Write-in rules required that the candidate's name be spelled correctly on the ballot. The candidate benefited, apparently, from the fact that his name is "G.," which is relatively easy to spell.

** Candidate will fill out the term-for-life of his predecessor.

A ballot initiative to make it a capital offense to respond to an interrogative phrase with the word "so" was defeated handily.

More news as it happens.