A National Conversation About Rays

[
[

Ray G.: Hello, I'm Ray.

Ray S.: And I'm Ray.

Ray G.: And we're having a national conversation about Rays.

Ray S.: Right you are.

Ray G.: Why is it a national conversation?

Ray S.: Well, we're having the conversation all over the nation.

Ray S.: And Canada?

Ray G.: Yeah, sure. Why not?

Ray S.: It's like they can't have their own conversation? They have to muscle in on ours?

Ray G.: They do that a lot. But it's OK if we let them join in.

Ray S.: OK. As long as they don't say: "We're having a national conversation a-boat Rays."

Ray G.: We'll cut them off if they try.

Ray S.: Good. "A-boat." I hate that.

Ray G.: Right like fingernails across a blackboard.

Ray S.: Great. Why don't you start us off, Ray?

Ray G.: Well, Ray, I couldn't help noticing that you are a Negro.

Ray S.: Yes, Ray, or as we like to say where I come from, "Ray of Color."

Ray G.: "Ray of Color," I like that.

Ray S.: Yes, it's very upbeat and positive. Not at all Gay.

Ray G.: Not that there's anything wrong with that, but that's a different conversation.

Ray S.: Indeed.

Ray G.: This is a very open and honest conversation. we're laying it all out on the table.

Ray: Yep. We're gettin' it all out there.

Ray G.: So if you're a "Ray of Color," what am I?

Ray S.: Well, Ray, there are many terms that fit. What does the "G" stand for?

Ray G.: I don't follow.

Ray S.: What does the "G" in your name stand for?

Ray G.: It doesn't stand for anything. It's just "G."

Ray S.: Your name is Ray G?

Ray G.: Yes. So? what does that make me?

Ray S.: R-A-Y-G-E?

Ray G.: How about Ray of Light?

Ray S.: How are you a Ray of Light?

Ray G.: Being so much lighter than you, I just naturally assumed...

Ray S: Well, Ray, that's kind of copying. Frankly, it sounds a little desperate. You know, "Ray of Color" is very down, very hip, very now. "Ray of Light" is just a pale imitation.

Ray G.: But that was kinda the point.

Ray S.: No good. No good. Think of something else.

Ray G.: Ray-the-Man?

Ray S.: Why don't we take a caller?

Ray G.: Good idea.

Ray S.: Hello, you're on the air. What's your name and where are you calling from?

Ray C.: Hi. I'm Ray C. I'm calling from Vancouver, B.C.

Ray G.: Ray, what's on your mind?

Ray C.: Well I wanted to talk a-boat Canadian Rays.

Ray S.: What did he say? What did he say?

Ray G.: He said he wanted to talk a-boat something.

Ray S.: Cut him off! Cut him off!

Ray G.: Scram, Ray!

Ray S.: How did he get past the screeners?

Ray G.: I guess they're sleeping on the job.

Ray S.: Yeah, like the White House social secretary and the Secret Service. Do they think that any ol' Ray can boogie on in here?

Ray G.: Why don't we try another caller?

Ray S.: OK. But no funny stuff.

Ray G.: Hello. You're on the air. what's you're name and where are you calling from?

Ray N.: Hi. I'm Ray N. calling from Seattle.

Ray S.: Ray N. in Seattle. That's about right.

Ray G.: I'll say. What's on your mind, Ray?

Ray N. Nothing. I just wanted to hear my name on the radio.

Ray S.: Thanks for the call, Ray. Stay dry, brother.

Ray G.: We have time for one more caller. why don't you field this one?

Ray S.: Hello. You're on the air. What's your name and where are you calling from?

Ray V.: Hi, Great show, guys. Ray V. Calling from Ray County, Missouri.

Ray S.: A big shout out to all the Rays of Ray County!

Ray G.: Ditto.

Ray S.: Anything more you want to say, Ray?

Ray C.: Nope. You guys pretty much said it all.

Ray G.: Thanks for the call, Ray.

Ray S.: Well that's all the time we have for today.

Ray G.: I feel much better about having this national conversation. I like all national conversations, of course. But so many national conversations are just blah, blah, blah and nothing ever really gets said. This was a pretty good national conversation.

Ray S.: I guess. It was more like a national chit-chat.

Ray G.: We squeezed a lot in. The nation's much better off, now, and it's time to go, Ray.

Ray S.: OK. But before we go -- We still didn't come up with a moniker for you. If I'm a Ray of Color, what should we call you?

Ray G.: You can call me "Ray."