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Critical Reading
Sentence Completion
In this section, choose the words and phrases that best complete the sentences below.
1. When asked to "go ________ herself," Brett replies “Not tonight, I have a ________.”
A. and figure it our for . . cooking show to watch on TV
B. pay . . World War II documentary to watch on TV
B. correct . . a pot with water I’m trying to boil to watch
B. excuse . . .funny feeling I might miss something, like dessert or something
A. to the grocery store . . .cooking show – season finale – to watch on TV.
2. Because gathering truffles is such a______________ process, they are sold in supermarkets at ___________ prices.
A. European girlie man . . .ambiguous
A. he-man. . .firm
A. European girlie man . . .ambiguous
A. bitter . . .penniless
E. European girlie man . . .ambiguous
3. His_____________nature allowed him to see what others could not see.
A. pessimistic
B. optimistic
C. solipsistic
D. narcissistic
E. Supercalafragilistic
4. Before they ______________ their camping trip on Friday, they went to the mall to purchase some _____________ including insect repellent and a flint.
A. got a divorce as a result of . . things to kill each other with,
B. fled in terror from. . .running shoes and other stuff,
C. nearly burnt a forest to the ground during. . . accelerants,
D. abandoned all hope of ever having a good time on . . . things that they clearly did not know how to use,
E. went insane while on . . . things that insane people find amusing.
Passage Based Questions
As he approaches his first tree of the day, S. Mohan presses his calloused palms together and bows his head.
“Oh God, I am climbing the coconut tree,” he whispers. “Protect me from harm.”
With no safety gear beyond a strap of palm frond tied around his ankles, he launches himself onto the tree’s arcing trunk, which rises dozens of feet into the air. With a swift series of spider-like maneuvers, he is at the top of the tree within seconds, slicing the nuts from their stems with a heavy blade he carries tucked into his loincloth.
One misstep and he would surely fall, as much as 100 feet to the ground.
5. In the above passage, what is Mr. Darcy’s primary motivation?
A. Sex
B. Drugs
A. Rock ‘n Roll
C. There is nobody named Mr. Darcy in the above passage.
C. Had you bothered to read the above passage, you would have known that.
6. The passage describes coconut-picking as something that is:
A. not unlike gathering truffles
B. somewhat similar to gathering truffles
C. about as far removed from gathering truffles as you can get
D. something that Mr. Darcy would not think of doing.
E. What's the 411 about you and Mr. Darcy, anyway?
7. In the final sentence of paragraph 3 the author expresses:
A. breast milk
B. Eeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwww
C. None of the below
D. Some of the above
E. All of the below
Math
Multiple Choice
8. Irving is on a north-bound commuter train moving at an average speed of 80 miles per hour (because miles per hour is one of the few things left that the Socialists haven't ruined yet in this country), trying to get into the snack bar which is jammed with illegal immigrants not speaking English, fingering their newly-issued driver's licenses while on their way to class at the state university courtesy of the subsidized in-state tuition that the fellow travelers in the legislature have just foisted on the taxpayers. Which of the following correctly expresses the relationship between the value of a Hostess cupcake in the train's snack bar and a Twinky at the newsstand in the station?
A. x > y > z
B. x + y = z
C. x - y = z
D. z + z + t + o + p
E. Secret lovers.
9. A piggy bank contains 300 pennies, 45 nickels, and 132 quarters. If the number of pennies is reduced by 50% and the number of quarters is increased by 25%, what is the probability that the newspaper delivery-person will miss the house again next Sunday?
A. Oh, pretty high, I'd say, based on past performance
B. 1 in 8
C. They won't miss the house; they'll deliver the wrong paper
D. 1 in 1
E. in 1 1
10. Which of the following represents the greatest value?
A. gold ("it's never been worth zero!")
B. silver (that's right, silver!)
C. stocks
D. credit default swaps
E. 3 * the product of the smallest two odd numbers
11. If 5x = 1 and y/2 = 3, then
A. I'm a monkey's uncle
B. I'm a monkey's cousin twice removed
C. I'm not related to a monkey, even though we have the same last name
D. This is a trick question because the equation isn't
E.IhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemath
12. A child is presented with 20 books. She can choose any 3. How many possible combinations of 3 books are there, and which books will she choose?
A. 60 -- Harold and the Purple Crayon, The Autobiography of Malcom X, The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin
B. 40 -- The Autobiography of Harold, The Autobiography of Harold and Maude, The Autobiography of the Purple Crayon
C. 90 -- The Autobiography of Some Guy, Bartholomew and the Oobleck, The Autobiography of the Oobleck
D. 120 -- The Color Purple, Harold and the Color Purple, the Purple Goat
E. 3 -- Six Characters in Search of an Author, Nine Authors in Search of an Agent, A Book in search of a Reader.
Improving Sentences
Read the sentence below and then choose the most appropriate replacement from the choices presented.
13. Ethics, finding it confusing, is a subject avoided by many law students who go on to practice law.
A. Always get the money up front.
B. Round up when billing.
C. Paper the file with CYA letters.
D. Blame all mistakes on the secretary.
E. Because ethics is a confusing subject, many law students who go on to practice law find it is a subject best avoided.
Improving Paragraphs
(1) Most people realize that regular exercise is utterly pointless. (2) The "exercise" fad is a scam pushed by the treadmill lobby. (3) Intense exercise can harm the endorphins and pixies who reside in the brain. (4) All of these are compelling reasons to sue your personal trainer. (5) Of course, if, like the vast majority of people who have seen their wealth reduced and, in some cases, their lives devastated by the criminals who brought us the financial crisis, worrying about a personal trainer is hardly a top priority right now. (6) In addition, people who exercise regularly may well live in a part of town that the government utterly ignores so that, they are constantly running just to keep away from the thugs who hang out on the corners.
14. Sentence 4 would make the most sense if placed:
A. under a quilt
B. after Sentence 1
C. Hint: If you answered "B," try not to pin too many hopes on getting into college.
D. after Sentence 7
E. yeah, we noticed that, too.
15. In context, which of the following revisions should be made to sentence 2?
A. Add "kick" after "can."
B. Add "Be it now enacted" to the beginning of the sentence.
C. Combine sentences 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6 to make one really huge sentence.
D. Change "can" to "can't"
E. Delete the word "mental."
Essay
16. War -- what's it good for?
Assignment: Prepare an essay explaining what war is good for. Your essay should contain at least 39 things that war is good for.
Answer Key:
1. Correct Answer: E
Explanation: E is the most logical choice, because it's the season finale.
2. Correct Answer: A
Explanation: Do we really have to spell this out?
3. Correct Answer: E
Explanation: The sentence describes someone who is able to see the supercalifragilistic side of a situation. It's obvious.
4. Correct Answer: A-E
Explanation: There really is no wrong answer here.
5. Correct Answer: A
Explanation: When in doubt, choose A.
6. Correct Answer: B
Explanation: Sometimes when in doubt, choose B.
7. Correct Answer: D
Explanation: The final sentence of the passage expresses dismay about the fact that more people are having plastic surgery. It's very subtle. You have to look for the hidden clues.
8. Correct Answer: A
To answer this question, you have to lie down in a dark room for several hours. It's just a headache.
9. Correct Answer: A
Explanation: Again, obvious.
10. Correct Answer: A
Explanation: So they say on daytime TV.
11. Correct Answer: E
Explanation: So obvious.
12. Correct Answer: 1/2
13. Correct Answer: A. This is the first thing you learn.
14. Correct Answer: E
Explanation: At other times, when in doubt, choose E.
15. Correct Answer: D
Explanation: We're out of explanations -- and excuses.
16. Correct Answer: D
Test time: 18 minutes.
Sentence Completion
In this section, choose the words and phrases that best complete the sentences below.
1. When asked to "go ________ herself," Brett replies “Not tonight, I have a ________.”
A. and figure it our for . . cooking show to watch on TV
B. pay . . World War II documentary to watch on TV
B. correct . . a pot with water I’m trying to boil to watch
B. excuse . . .funny feeling I might miss something, like dessert or something
A. to the grocery store . . .cooking show – season finale – to watch on TV.
2. Because gathering truffles is such a______________ process, they are sold in supermarkets at ___________ prices.
A. European girlie man . . .ambiguous
A. he-man. . .firm
A. European girlie man . . .ambiguous
A. bitter . . .penniless
E. European girlie man . . .ambiguous
3. His_____________nature allowed him to see what others could not see.
A. pessimistic
B. optimistic
C. solipsistic
D. narcissistic
E. Supercalafragilistic
4. Before they ______________ their camping trip on Friday, they went to the mall to purchase some _____________ including insect repellent and a flint.
A. got a divorce as a result of . . things to kill each other with,
B. fled in terror from. . .running shoes and other stuff,
C. nearly burnt a forest to the ground during. . . accelerants,
D. abandoned all hope of ever having a good time on . . . things that they clearly did not know how to use,
E. went insane while on . . . things that insane people find amusing.
Passage Based Questions
As he approaches his first tree of the day, S. Mohan presses his calloused palms together and bows his head.
“Oh God, I am climbing the coconut tree,” he whispers. “Protect me from harm.”
With no safety gear beyond a strap of palm frond tied around his ankles, he launches himself onto the tree’s arcing trunk, which rises dozens of feet into the air. With a swift series of spider-like maneuvers, he is at the top of the tree within seconds, slicing the nuts from their stems with a heavy blade he carries tucked into his loincloth.
One misstep and he would surely fall, as much as 100 feet to the ground.
5. In the above passage, what is Mr. Darcy’s primary motivation?
A. Sex
B. Drugs
A. Rock ‘n Roll
C. There is nobody named Mr. Darcy in the above passage.
C. Had you bothered to read the above passage, you would have known that.
6. The passage describes coconut-picking as something that is:
A. not unlike gathering truffles
B. somewhat similar to gathering truffles
C. about as far removed from gathering truffles as you can get
D. something that Mr. Darcy would not think of doing.
E. What's the 411 about you and Mr. Darcy, anyway?
7. In the final sentence of paragraph 3 the author expresses:
A. breast milk
B. Eeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwww
C. None of the below
D. Some of the above
E. All of the below
Math
Multiple Choice
8. Irving is on a north-bound commuter train moving at an average speed of 80 miles per hour (because miles per hour is one of the few things left that the Socialists haven't ruined yet in this country), trying to get into the snack bar which is jammed with illegal immigrants not speaking English, fingering their newly-issued driver's licenses while on their way to class at the state university courtesy of the subsidized in-state tuition that the fellow travelers in the legislature have just foisted on the taxpayers. Which of the following correctly expresses the relationship between the value of a Hostess cupcake in the train's snack bar and a Twinky at the newsstand in the station?
A. x > y > z
B. x + y = z
C. x - y = z
D. z + z + t + o + p
E. Secret lovers.
9. A piggy bank contains 300 pennies, 45 nickels, and 132 quarters. If the number of pennies is reduced by 50% and the number of quarters is increased by 25%, what is the probability that the newspaper delivery-person will miss the house again next Sunday?
A. Oh, pretty high, I'd say, based on past performance
B. 1 in 8
C. They won't miss the house; they'll deliver the wrong paper
D. 1 in 1
E. in 1 1
10. Which of the following represents the greatest value?
A. gold ("it's never been worth zero!")
B. silver (that's right, silver!)
C. stocks
D. credit default swaps
E. 3 * the product of the smallest two odd numbers
11. If 5x = 1 and y/2 = 3, then
A. I'm a monkey's uncle
B. I'm a monkey's cousin twice removed
C. I'm not related to a monkey, even though we have the same last name
D. This is a trick question because the equation isn't
E.IhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemathIhatemath
12. A child is presented with 20 books. She can choose any 3. How many possible combinations of 3 books are there, and which books will she choose?
A. 60 -- Harold and the Purple Crayon, The Autobiography of Malcom X, The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin
B. 40 -- The Autobiography of Harold, The Autobiography of Harold and Maude, The Autobiography of the Purple Crayon
C. 90 -- The Autobiography of Some Guy, Bartholomew and the Oobleck, The Autobiography of the Oobleck
D. 120 -- The Color Purple, Harold and the Color Purple, the Purple Goat
E. 3 -- Six Characters in Search of an Author, Nine Authors in Search of an Agent, A Book in search of a Reader.
Improving Sentences
Read the sentence below and then choose the most appropriate replacement from the choices presented.
13. Ethics, finding it confusing, is a subject avoided by many law students who go on to practice law.
A. Always get the money up front.
B. Round up when billing.
C. Paper the file with CYA letters.
D. Blame all mistakes on the secretary.
E. Because ethics is a confusing subject, many law students who go on to practice law find it is a subject best avoided.
Improving Paragraphs
(1) Most people realize that regular exercise is utterly pointless. (2) The "exercise" fad is a scam pushed by the treadmill lobby. (3) Intense exercise can harm the endorphins and pixies who reside in the brain. (4) All of these are compelling reasons to sue your personal trainer. (5) Of course, if, like the vast majority of people who have seen their wealth reduced and, in some cases, their lives devastated by the criminals who brought us the financial crisis, worrying about a personal trainer is hardly a top priority right now. (6) In addition, people who exercise regularly may well live in a part of town that the government utterly ignores so that, they are constantly running just to keep away from the thugs who hang out on the corners.
14. Sentence 4 would make the most sense if placed:
A. under a quilt
B. after Sentence 1
C. Hint: If you answered "B," try not to pin too many hopes on getting into college.
D. after Sentence 7
E. yeah, we noticed that, too.
15. In context, which of the following revisions should be made to sentence 2?
A. Add "kick" after "can."
B. Add "Be it now enacted" to the beginning of the sentence.
C. Combine sentences 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6 to make one really huge sentence.
D. Change "can" to "can't"
E. Delete the word "mental."
Essay
16. War -- what's it good for?
Assignment: Prepare an essay explaining what war is good for. Your essay should contain at least 39 things that war is good for.
Answer Key:
1. Correct Answer: E
Explanation: E is the most logical choice, because it's the season finale.
2. Correct Answer: A
Explanation: Do we really have to spell this out?
3. Correct Answer: E
Explanation: The sentence describes someone who is able to see the supercalifragilistic side of a situation. It's obvious.
4. Correct Answer: A-E
Explanation: There really is no wrong answer here.
5. Correct Answer: A
Explanation: When in doubt, choose A.
6. Correct Answer: B
Explanation: Sometimes when in doubt, choose B.
7. Correct Answer: D
Explanation: The final sentence of the passage expresses dismay about the fact that more people are having plastic surgery. It's very subtle. You have to look for the hidden clues.
8. Correct Answer: A
To answer this question, you have to lie down in a dark room for several hours. It's just a headache.
9. Correct Answer: A
Explanation: Again, obvious.
10. Correct Answer: A
Explanation: So they say on daytime TV.
11. Correct Answer: E
Explanation: So obvious.
12. Correct Answer: 1/2
13. Correct Answer: A. This is the first thing you learn.
14. Correct Answer: E
Explanation: At other times, when in doubt, choose E.
15. Correct Answer: D
Explanation: We're out of explanations -- and excuses.
16. Correct Answer: D
Test time: 18 minutes.
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