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Lying on your back, close your eyes and bring your knees to your chest. Try not to think about your account being overdrawn all week, and feel the stress melt away.
Now stretch out your left leg and point your toes towards the ceiling. As you do so, remember that the car mechanic needs to eat, too, and if, as is likely, he overcharged you for the alternator, it will hopefully even out in the end.
Sit in a comfortable posture with an erect spine, preferably in a specific yoga posture such as the padmasana or the Lotus posture. Pay no attention to the scene playing over and over in your mind's eye of you screwing up royally at work today and your boss hauling you in on the carpet.
Energize the breath through pranayama. Resist the urge to obsess about the impending IRS audit. For everything there is a time and a place. Your time will surely come.
Hold a visualization for a few minutes to clear the sensory field and focus the mind internally. (The city affixing a "boot" to your car as a result of your scofflaw status while you are lying on the floor on a mat in a room full of strangers is a good example of one to avoid).
Repeat an affirmation or prayer to increase positive thought power. For example, you might chant: "Everybody else is having more fun than I will ever have in this and every other life I will ever live. I accept and embrace my suffering. Suffering nurtures the soul and prevents me from wasting my time getting paid obscene amounts of money to party at the Playboy Mansion, hang out with beautiful naked chicks in the hot tub, and play Beatles (TM) Rock Band (TM) all the time."
Repeat a mantra such as "OM" or "Ohm" or "OMG!" or "LOL" or "One Hundred and Seven" to still the mind. Ideally one should repeat a mantra at least 108 times before the meditation. Some find that an effective mantra involves calculating the bottomless National Debt on a kind of mental clock, like the one they sometimes have on the Jumbotron in Times. Square. The National Debt goes up by about a million dollars a second, so this exercise will keep your mind sharp and alert.
Silently observe the mind and let it empty itself out, not unlike the way that your 401k has been emptied out in the past year. As you do so, avert your gaze from the discolored blotch on your wrist that suddenly and mysteriously appeared for the first time last week.
Depending on one`s natural temperament, it would help to try and establish contact with a Higher Consciousness through the natural movement of one`s heart. Your attempted contact is very important to the Higher Consciousness who is busy comforting others at the moment. Your patience is appreciated. All entreaties to the Higher Consciousness will be responded to in the order in which they are received.
You may now go forth refreshed and at peace.
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Lying on your back, close your eyes and bring your knees to your chest. Try not to think about your account being overdrawn all week, and feel the stress melt away.
Now stretch out your left leg and point your toes towards the ceiling. As you do so, remember that the car mechanic needs to eat, too, and if, as is likely, he overcharged you for the alternator, it will hopefully even out in the end.
Sit in a comfortable posture with an erect spine, preferably in a specific yoga posture such as the padmasana or the Lotus posture. Pay no attention to the scene playing over and over in your mind's eye of you screwing up royally at work today and your boss hauling you in on the carpet.
Energize the breath through pranayama. Resist the urge to obsess about the impending IRS audit. For everything there is a time and a place. Your time will surely come.
Hold a visualization for a few minutes to clear the sensory field and focus the mind internally. (The city affixing a "boot" to your car as a result of your scofflaw status while you are lying on the floor on a mat in a room full of strangers is a good example of one to avoid).
Repeat an affirmation or prayer to increase positive thought power. For example, you might chant: "Everybody else is having more fun than I will ever have in this and every other life I will ever live. I accept and embrace my suffering. Suffering nurtures the soul and prevents me from wasting my time getting paid obscene amounts of money to party at the Playboy Mansion, hang out with beautiful naked chicks in the hot tub, and play Beatles (TM) Rock Band (TM) all the time."
Repeat a mantra such as "OM" or "Ohm" or "OMG!" or "LOL" or "One Hundred and Seven" to still the mind. Ideally one should repeat a mantra at least 108 times before the meditation. Some find that an effective mantra involves calculating the bottomless National Debt on a kind of mental clock, like the one they sometimes have on the Jumbotron in Times. Square. The National Debt goes up by about a million dollars a second, so this exercise will keep your mind sharp and alert.
Silently observe the mind and let it empty itself out, not unlike the way that your 401k has been emptied out in the past year. As you do so, avert your gaze from the discolored blotch on your wrist that suddenly and mysteriously appeared for the first time last week.
Depending on one`s natural temperament, it would help to try and establish contact with a Higher Consciousness through the natural movement of one`s heart. Your attempted contact is very important to the Higher Consciousness who is busy comforting others at the moment. Your patience is appreciated. All entreaties to the Higher Consciousness will be responded to in the order in which they are received.
You may now go forth refreshed and at peace.
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